Review – Chastity Bites (2014)

There are a lot of Bathory movies around of varying degrees of success. My favorite has got to be Ceremonia sangrienta from 1973. Yeah it’s been a while. Though it used to be common, the subject has been quiet as of late. I wonder what it would be like to have Bathory around in modern times, in the age of the Kardashians and Jersey Shore. High Schoolers are not what they used to be so how would she even find virgins that weren’t shut ins? Luckily, Chastity Bites answers those questions.

Chastity Bites the story of Leah (Allison Scagliotti), an awkward and standoffish teen who has basically shut out the rest of the world with the exception of BFF Katherine (Francia Raisa). Things are a little tense as Leah is trying to find THE story that will jumpstart her career. That story falls in her lap with the arrival of Liz Batho (Louise Griffiths), a woman who enters the community and abruptly starts a school club for young women called V.A.G. (Virginity Action Group). She preaches abstinence the young popular girls go along with it, mind you; this is for their own personal gain of course.  With the entire community sucked into this virginal web, Leah is left alone to figure out what really going on and why Liz has such a hold on everyone. 
Chastity Bites is a coming of age story with a vampire twist. Sure we’ve seen it all before, but not like this.  What sets this film apart is, well, just about everything. This is a top notch horror comedy that could easily fit with your John Hughes collection. It’s smart, funny, and has a respect for the genre. This is a film about characters and they don’t let you down either. 
Leah (Warehouse 13’s Allison Scagliotti) is interesting and holds our attention. What I like about her is that she isn’t the usual good girl, but a self-righteous and “bitchy” outsider. Despite these short comings, we can’t help but like her and that takes something special. She definitely holds her own against Louise Griffiths’ Liz Batho, a statuesque woman with looks that kill, Louise is a commanding presence on screen and play the part with equal menace and fun. 
Chastity Bites is one of those rare independent features that work on all levels, always difficult, but more so because of the comedy. It succeeds and I would dare put it up there with American Mary as two of the finest independent horror feature debuts in recent years. Don’t waste time.  Check this one out!
Into 60’s hotrod cool, 70’s horror and 80’s punk. comics, video games.
Favorite Movies:Return of the Living Dead, Re-Animator, Evil Dead, Texas Chain-saw Massacre, Murder Mansion, etc.

Favorite Music:The Misfits (Danzig era), White/Rob Zombie, X, Marilyn Manson

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